The exclusion of intimacy in the sexuality of the contemporary college-age population
Cobliner, W.G.
Adolescence 23(89): 99-113
1988
ISSN/ISBN: 0001-8449 PMID: 3381692 Document Number: 308153
The sexual mores of the contemporary college population have undergone some fundamental changes in the past twenty-five years. Converging evidence from a variety of reliable sources obtained from a wide range of seemingly adjusted subjects, including personal interviews by the author, indicates that sexual involvement between partners of the opposite sex has been sporadic, episodic, without commitment, and accompanied by a deliberate effort of both partners to suppress tender, romantic feelings and intimacy. The sources of this situation are linked to changes in five domains: the ethos, the ascent of women, advances in contraceptive methods, residential mobility, and changes in child-rearing patterns. This premeditated restraint of affect has led to a noticeable diminishment of gratification derived from sexual union. It has contributed to sexual apathy, to discord, and a substantial rise in the incidence of two types of psychiatric disturbance--depersonalization and derealization. Sexual union, instead of enhancing sociability, acts as a barrier and inhibitor of enduring attachment and a sense of continuity. The repercussions on the social fabric are unexplored and merit systematic study. It is suggested that the prevailing sexual conventions of college-age youth clash with the fundamental urge to form human attachments; diminish and often shut out the experience of passion in sexual unions; and bring about inner turmoil that weakens self-confidence. As a result, it is concluded that the prevailing college-age mores are maladaptive on the individual as well as the interpersonal level. In due time, they will be replaced by more fitting conventions. This process of replacement can be hastened by an appropriate educational intervention involving younger age groups.